Still Present

Ernie and I are living apart right now. He is still boarded near my previous home, which is 40 minutes away from where I’m living. The distance is hard. I miss him. Words can hardly express how much I look forward to bringing him home and getting to care for him every day. I’m giddy with excitement. I’m tearful at the prospect. I long for the day.

Even though I do not see him very often right now, I know he’s still there. I know where to find him when I want to see him.

There are time when I can’t see or hear or feeel God’s presence in my life either and yet I trust and have faith that he’s still with me, orchestrating the big and small in my life.

How do I know?

I know because when I least expect it, out of no effort of my own, something happens – a prayer is answered, a person I’ve been thinking about calls, doors are opened. A month ago I was fearful and pleading with God to provide for me in my new home. The bills were intimidating me at the time. Since then, he’s brought me a near-overwhelming amount of business and prospects for the future. I’ve done nothing different to cultivate new business in the last month.

I also know because the Bible promises he is always present:

Joshua 1:9 (NLT) (God speaking): ” This is my command—be strong and courageous! Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”

Matthew 28:20b (NLT) (Jesus speaking): “And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”

There may be some of you who think that these promises were for specific people who lived long ago. But the truth is, we can trust them because God doesn’t change. His omnipresence didn’t cease at any point.

Hebrews 13:8 (NLT): “Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever.”

Psalm 102:26-27 (NLT): Long ago you laid the foundation of the earth
      and made the heavens with your hands.
 26 They will perish, but you remain forever;
      they will wear out like old clothing.
   You will change them like a garment
      and discard them.
 27 But you are always the same;
      you will live forever.

I also trust he’s with me even if it may not seem like he is because I have faith. And according to Hebrews 11:1 (NLT), “Faith is the confidence that what we hope for will actually happen; it gives us assurance about things we cannot see.” (ital mine)

With a trust that God is ever-present in my life, I can go to him anytime, with the confidence that he hears my prayers and knows my every need and concern. Just as I know Ernie is still close by and I can go to him whenever I’d like.

Someday soon, Ernie will be a few steps away. I will see him all the time. We will be closer than ever before. And that, my friends, is the kind of relationship I long for with God.

Desolation

The wind whips across the back pasture, spinning the snow into small cyclones and leaving behind crests and valleys. Last summer’s weeds are bent beneath the snow with stray blade poking through. The towering oaks are stripped naked. An occasional cluster of leaves bounce across the top of the crusty snow. From my view, there’s no life. It looks uninhabitable. Stark. Frigid.

DE Blizzard1 by Larry Wilder

Sadly, this is sometimes the condition of my heart as well. Desolate. Cold. Empty. Barren. There’s a yearning for more – to be filled up spiritually.

It’s a dark night of the soul.

We intellectually know God is present and active in our lives and yet his silence is as eerie as the wind-whipped field. His absence as stark as the fallow pasture. Bible study and prayer seem as routine and stimulating as brushing our teeth. We’re going through the motions and even that requires a major effort to continue.

Like the pasture out my back window, eventually spring will come to my heart. New life will appear. The hard ground will thaw and the snow will melt. God will bring restoration.

If only the end of this dark night were as predictable as the end of winter.

 

Question: If you’ve faced a dark night of the soul, how have you seen yourself through it? What did you experience on the other side?